Monday, January 20, 2014

Is This Your First?

The Wagner’s have some announcements to make, …, in no particular order.  Because, after all, who could chose which to pick to announce first.  So,…, I just flipped a coin.  Like, really, I just flipped a quarter:

#1 – HEADS – Our Dossier is complete and on its way to the Dominican.  I blame the home study process for sucking all my blogging-ness out of me.  Alas!, it is off.  We are celebrating and thankful.

#2 – TAILS – I am pregnant!  And not just a little bit, (she says ironically).  Truly, my body holds a little girl that will waken to this big, beautiful, and terrifying world in early May.  Imagine our joy.

I am six months bodily pregnant, (oh baby yes), and just started really showing this week.  And so, with the new found freedom I feel with a healthy ultrasound, I have been slowly telling people that don’t know our sweet, long, desirous tale of entering parenthood.  And they innocently they ask: is this your first? 

Oh the answers I could give and the ones I have tried on.  The most simple and honest one I can muster is: kind of.  I say with all grace; I do feel deep grace for the question.  Because who would guess that we have had many firsts, and all deserve celebration, and all ask for patience, and all have brought me here: expectant in more ways than one.  And most fully open to all of it. 

Disclaimer: It is so common for a pregnant mother in the adoption process to hear about an aunt’s friends sister who “had the same thing happen! “  And all the reasons why this may be.  Dear friends, at best it is an urban legend and at worst it speaking for God where we cannot.  Trust me, we have all heard these stories.  And trust me, they are not true of everyone.  Lastly, trust me, it is all good.   


  1. I've read this like 5 times by now. My excitement doesn't seem to wane.

  2. Love this. .. Love YOU more and your bravery to share your story. A gift. To all who have ears to hear...keep writing if you will! As you get the energy to...and keep giving us grace, if you will.expectedly waiting with you...

  3. To be in the front row seats watching the birth of two long awaited children. It is beyond prividge for me. I feel like I am in a great read expectant and wondering how God is going to birth the Wagner family. Thank you for sharing with us. So excited for you both :).

  4. Three of my favorite people commenting and I just now read them! I need to tighten up my comments game! :) You woman are the reason I keep going and hoping. xo.